Forgiveness

To talk about forgiveness, is to talk about the nature of God Himself.

Even when we talk about healing – God is the Healer. Mostly, when we pray for a sick person, it is an exception for somebody to really be healed. This was something that worried me for many years – I never had an answer on that.

But now God gave me this revelation about forgiveness, and some other things also became clearer. Perhaps this can bring us nearer to healing.

We read Matthew 18:21–35, where Peter asked Jesus: “Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Until seven times?” Jesus answered:

I say not to you unto seven times, but unto seventy times seven times. Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a man, a king, who would make a reckoning with his servants. When he had begun to reckon, one was brought to him, who owed him ten thousand talents. Because he couldn’t pay, the lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife and his children and all that he had, to pay his debt. The servant then fell down and worshiped him, saying: Have patience with me and I will pay you all. The lord of that servant was moved with compassion, so he released him and forgave him the loan.

But, that same servant went out and found one of his fellow-servants who owed him a hundred shillings, and he laid hold of him and took him by the throat, saying: Pay me all you owe. His fellow-servant then fell down and besought him saying: have patience with me and I will pay you. But he would not and went and cast him into prison, till he should pay what was due.

His fellow-servants therefore saw what was done and were exceeding sorry and came and told their lord all that was done. Then his lord called him and said to him: Wicked servant, I forgave you all that debt since you pleaded with me, should you not also have had mercy on your fellow-servant as I had mercy on you? And his lord was angry and delivered him to the tormentors till he should pay all that was due.

Thus also shall My heavenly Father do to you, if you forgive not each his brother from your hearts. Matthew 18:21–35

Many sermons were preached on this scripture – and that is very good.

This is so important! Through the ages – as is the case today – millions of murders were committed because people don’t forgive. Millions of people committed suicide for the same reason.

Most wars were fought because of un-forgiveness; millions of children were left orphans only because people didn’t forgive. Homes are wrecked; people are in jail, all because people don’t forgive, as Jesus tells us to do. How many millions of people are sick of stress and other diseases, because of the same reason – it’s impossible to tell, and all because they didn’t heed the words of Jesus Christ.

Un-forgiveness is the real binding from which almost everybody needs to be delivered. Un-forgiveness is the plans of satan to bind God’s people—we have to know it! (2 Corinthians 2:10–11)

Some years ago God brought this issue about forgiveness to our attention. I asked Holy Spirit to show me if there were anybody against whom I had something. I really wanted to forgive, in order not to block my spiritual growth.

Immediately I found that I was thinking back to some instances where somebody had hurt me. At that time my mother was already dead for many years, but many times, for months afterwards, I found myself thinking about some wrong, or imaginary wrong in my youth, where she wronged me – thinking about it, was hurtful.

Whenever the thought came, I forgave in the Name of Jesus!

I was molested as child and it influenced my whole life, until I discovered forgiveness.

Many different other people – I was amazed to find against how many people I really had “something” to forgive. So, I forgave; time after time, asking God to forgive me because of my un-forgiveness about which I didn’t even know.

Through the following years, God gave me many other revelations, I was busy with God’s work, and the issue of forgiveness was in the background – I thought I did forgive where was necessary. I no longer worked on it every day.

Then something happened in my life – something so difficult, so horrible, so very painful. My husband met another “love.”

Well, I had to forgive. I knew I had to forgive, and I wanted to forgive because I wanted to obey God. I tried to forgive, but on the condition that the people concerned had to repent – or at least to admit and confess.

While Boet and I discussed it and prayed about it, Holy Spirit made it clear to us that we need to forgive unconditionally – not with the thought that they had to rectify the wrong – they needn’t admit or confess anything – in any case, not to me – I had to forgive with all my heart; it was between God and ME—only.

Immediately I praised God and forgave my husband—as well as was possible for me, and had some peace as far as he was concerned, but not the woman!

I knew I did forgive, I praised God because He helped me to forgive – I really tried! But, the grudge remained. I think it’s difficult to understand for somebody who is not in that position – and reader, thank God continually because you are not in that position.

I had this grudge against her; I didn’t want to see her, I didn’t want to hear anything about her – I just didn’t want anything to do with her.

I said it was like a glass that fell on a rock; it was shattered, it was impossible for it to be whole again. It did happen, it can’t be called back.

And so I stumbled forth. For about four years I forgave over and over again – without peace and with this bitter pain in my heart. With this grudge in my heart against the woman.

In the meantime I had another problem with my heart – doctors gave me five years on the most to live. I was praying many times a day for Jesus to please heal me – I didn’t want to be sick and I knew God also didn’t want me sick.

At the same time I was praying God to please deliver me from this grudge – and I really meant it; I prayed, I petitioned, I fasted, anything just to be rid of that grudge.

Later again I thought if the person should confess, perhaps it would be easier for me to really forgive, to get that grudge out of my heart. I needed God’s peace in my heart, more than anything.

In the meantime my husband came back to me and the marriage was mended – in some measure – but the grudge stayed. Every day I thought about it, I worried about it and I prayed about it! It is very difficult to live without God’s peace in your heart.

Now people are asking me: “Why do we pray for people for healing without them getting healed? What is wrong? How do we get the faith of God for healing?” Don’t you think I know the answer – although I also know all the traditional answers – but do this answers really WORK?

Every honest person will admit; it doesn’t work. All our explanations and excuses are all only self-bluff – it doesn’t work.

I was living with the same problem; I was praying for myself as well as for many other people, but mostly none was healed. Now and then God reached through, in spite of our ignorance, and healed someone, by His mighty grace.

Well I, for one, can’t understand how God could have changed along the way.

Some days ago God got my attention on Matthew 18; forgiveness. Well, I know all these things, you know all these things – every born again person knows it; we knew it for many years. But, it is altogether something else to really get the hook-in from God.

Holy Spirit took me back to forgiveness. Jesus also said it in His prayer; “Forgive us our trespasses AS we also forgive them that sinned against us.”

This is a tall order! Here I had that grudge. Right, that person did not deserve to be forgiven, but did I? Did I deserve to be forgiven of God? Just as I am now doing to that person, this is the example that I give to God, how He has to forgive ME. Remember, “Forgive me AS I also forgive…” How I forgive, is the measure I give to God to measure His forgiveness to me.

“With what measure you measure, it shall be measured to you.” (Matthew 7:2) With the measure I measure forgiveness; this is the measure I’m giving into God’s hand to forgive me with.

If I’m forgiving only 5%, I pray God to also forgive me only 5%. “As I also forgive!” When I forgive 100%, I ask God to also forgive me 100%. (Matthew 6:12)

I’m saying: “Yes, I forgave her, but the glass is already broken it can’t be made whole again. I don’t want to see her or to hear anything about her; I don’t want anything to do with her.” I don’t hate her, although I don’t know what else it can be.

Now, if God forgives me like this for all the abominations and crimes that I have committed against Him, if He should say: “I surely did forgive Letta, but, this sin is not rectified yet; all this many dirty sins that she did are not yet cancelled, the pain she did to Me is not yet healed… I did forgive her, but I don’t want anything to do with her, I don’t want to see her.”

Can you see it? I really can’t afford God to forgive me like this – and I didn’t deserve His forgiveness. I expect Him to forgive me without me deserving it and then never to think about it again, but the measure I’m giving to Him is the grudge I am fondling in my heart.

This servant of our story owed some millions, and he knew that he could never pay it back. The Boss was very sorry for him, and told him: “Never mind, you need not pay me back.” Then the Boss did two things; He forgave him the debt, and he released him. He need not pay it back.

If you are forgiven, no matter what your debt, then it is gone, you need no longer pay. This is what Jesus did for us on the cross; He forgave all of our guilt and sin – we no longer need to pay!

After this servant’s big debt was forgiven, he went out and found another servant who owed him about R100, grabbed him at the throat and told him to pay, or go to prison. The other pleaded with him, but to no avail.

The other servants saw this wrong thing and go tell the Boss. Very shocked, the Boss handed him over to the punishers until such time he would be able to pay all. The punishers had to punish him, to give him pain, to hurt him. He brought it over himself, because he didn’t forgive. This is what he had sown for himself because of his un-forgiveness. Punishers until he could pay. When would that be? Never! He could never pay that millions. He had to be punished for ever and for ever.

Why? Only because he didn’t forgive. He was free, the Boss forgave him all, He could go on with his life, but for his un-forgiveness. With that, he did this serious thing to himself.

Jesus says: “Release, and you will be released.” (Luke 6:37) If you want to be forgiven, you have to forgive the other person who does not deserve it!

Because Lord Jesus wants for me to be very happy and blessed, He teaches me: “If you want the best for yourself, Letta, you have to do all good things to all other people, just as you want everything to be very good in your own life. For, just as you are doing to other people, so it will again be done unto you – your choice.” One of the good things is unconditional forgiveness.

It doesn’t matter who or how the other person is, what he does or what he doesn’t do, it has to do with you. You forgive and you do good things in order that you might be forgiven of God, and in order that good can be done to you. If you do something wrong to another, it is bad seed you are sowing, and it is very bad fruit you will reap in your own life and circumstances. Your choice!

If you don’t forgive, you are sowing for yourself the punishers. How many diseases do people have because of un-forgiveness? God’s healing is spiritual; contact between a person’s spirit and God’s Spirit in His Word. Then healing is made manifest in the body. The same with the cause of sickness; it is in the spirit, it is part of the spirit-man, it is an evil spirit like un-forgiveness and hatred, and then it also manifests in the body as sicknesses and diseases.

Someday it shows in your body. For years you may live with un-forgiveness and hatred, battling with stress and other illnesses, without you knowing the cause.

Un-forgiveness, hatred, worries, fear, all these things are evil spirits which a person allows in his or her life and it will surely affect your body – you will reap sickness. When we look at the emphasis Jesus puts on forgiveness, we can know that the biggest culprit is un-forgiveness. He tells us openly about it: You are heading for the punishers. You have the choice to forgive and be free, or to keep your un-forgiveness and be punished.

It is not the Lord who wants you to suffer, God doesn’t punish you; you choose punishment for yourself, by not doing God’s word. Mostly in ignorance, but, when you are sowing the seeds of a thorn tree by mistake, in ignorance, it still grows, just the same.

So, with the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ, I forgave the woman also—and with His help I forgave her unconditionally—praise and thanks to Jesus Christ! What a relief!

This happened 23 years ago, and my heart is still going strong! How I thank Jesus for His mercy!

How many times a person tells me: “But, I can’t forgive, the wrong against me is too big!” What they really mean, is: “I don’t want to forgive!” Immediately they argue, they won’t admit it. You can forgive – if you really want to – God won’t tell us to do something if we can’t do it. Holy Spirit will help you, as He helped me. He will never forsake you, as long as you choose to stay in His word.

Many think that, if they should forgive, it means they are going along with the wrongs of the person they forgive. That is not the case. Jesus doesn’t go along with my sins, but He forgives me unconditionally. There is a vast difference.

It happens that when I have forgiven whole heartedly, the thoughts of that person just keeps on tormenting me, but, this is where Jesus says: “Seventy times seven – you just keep on forgiving.” No, of course it is not nice, most of the time is very difficult, but you can! If you are a born-again child of God, you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. One of the gifts of Holy Spirit is self-control to be able to practice forgiveness. What grace!

I forgive because of my own peace – it is because God loves me so much, that He gives me this advice: “Forgive, forgive, forgive, for your own benefit.”

Don’t cling to the wrongs of the past, don’t stay a victim, don’t fondle the wrongs done against you, don’t always bring it up. Don’t always blame past wrongs. Forgive the past! Release it; it is the only way for you to be free.

We always want to help other people to live a righteous life, but God wants me to be righteous and because of that very happy and full of peace. Jesus tells me to first get rid of the beam in my own eye, in order to see clearly to be able to help the other person with his splinter. (Matthew 7:5)

This needs not be a negative word, it is to help me, and because of that, also the other person. God loves me! He doesn’t want me to hurt; He wants me to have His peace.

Think about it; if you had a grain of sand in your eye at this moment, would you keep yourself busy helping someone else? No! You won’t even think about helping other people, because of your own need. You will do all you can to first get rid of that grain of sand, because it hurts so much.

Whenever you have that beam in your eye, God sees how it hurts and how you have no peace and how you suffer, and He wants you to be helped, but you don’t even know why all things go wrong with you – you don’t forgive, you just go on preaching to other people.

To get rid of the beam, comes mostly by forgiving. Total forgiveness. It won’t do any good to start rubbing the other person’s eye – you won’t even think about it; you will do your best to get the beam out of your own eye. This is when you have a physical beam in the eye, but, a spiritual beam, like un-forgiveness – is just as painful, even worse.

Another way of thinking about un-forgiveness, is like carrying a bag of rotten meat on your shoulders day and night, week in and out, month in and out and year in and out. Eventually you will be getting sick and die because of being infected by this deadly evil spirit of un-forgiveness!

This is what Jesus tells us: You work on yourself. Jesus wants you to be perfectly whole, spirit, soul and body. Look what He told His secretary John to write to me: “Beloved, I wish that you may prosper in everything and that you are healthy, as your soul prospers.” (3 John 1:2)

God loves me with all of His love – and He loves you with all of His love. Just like a mother; I am a mother with five children. I don’t divide my love in five parts, and every child gets one-fifth of my love. I love each child with all my undivided love, as if she is my only child.

God is undivided; He is only one. He loves me with His total, everlasting love, as if I were the only human being ever on earth. As far as I’m concerned, He’s busy only with me and my interests. As far as you are concerned He’s busy with you and your concerns. God is not divided.

Jesus gave His all to me, just as He gave His all to you. All of His suffering, all of His death, He gave to every individual on earth, as if that person is the only human on earth.

He loves the serial murderer just as much and as unconditionally as He loves the Pope or the minister – or me.

Because we are human, we don’t “understand” unconditional love. Even a parent’s love is mostly not unconditional – the child has to be good or obedient or he has to perform to some extent for the parent to love him better. Not so with God. He loves because He IS love. Just think this through.

God is not busy with all the world and therefore I don’t want to disturb Him. As if I am the only person on earth, He is always, every second, undivided, only busy with me. As far as I’m concerned, He “left” all His other work and gives all His attention to me.

Just as a life-saver. He won’t try to save a sea full of drowning people at the same time; he gives all of his attention to one certain person; one at a time. Now this drowning person struggles and cries instead of just turning on his back and float – the life-saver is on his way!

God’s whole attention is on me, but, just like the life-saver, He has to swim against the waves and winds and storms of my fear and my un-forgiveness, negative beliefs. With all things that I’m living outside of God’s word, I am hindering God to do His best for me.

God is going nowhere; He IS, He never changes. Like a big and sharp stationary Light, God is always there. I choose to come nearer to Him, and in so doing I’m coming more and more into His light, or I choose to go further away from Him, and so I’m getting more and more into darkness. Always my own choice.

God didn’t choose for Adam and Eve to sin, the devil didn’t decide for them to sin, they chose for themselves – just as today, everybody chooses for himself to obey or to disobey the word of God.

You have to take your own beam, your own splinter, your own grain of sand out of your own eye. Each one of us sows every second of every day in his own soil, and each one of us will surely reap his own harvest. “For each shall bear his own burden.”

I have to forgive, for myself to be forgiven and to be free. This grudge that I had for about four years was only hurting my self. That woman lived happily; she felt nothing about my grudge – it only worried me, myself. It did her no damage, but I reaped the harvest of my grudge in my body as well as in my life.

Forgiveness has nothing to do with someone else; it has only to do with me. I’m damaging myself; my body and my whole life suffer because I don’t forgive. When I forgive it’s not for the sake of anybody else – in a sense not even for the sake of Jesus. I forgive in order that I may be forgiven, for my own peace.

Not to forgive, is disobedience to Jesus Christ, although I don’t do it because of Him, I do it because of myself – I am the one who suffers through my own disobedience.

Because of this it doesn’t matter how many times one sins against me and how many times I have to forgive him. It is not a “law” to forgive seven times; it is a Spiritual Law to forgive – or suffer the consequences.

Many times we are praying for healing without success. Don’t we have to go back to Matthew 18? Is there not perhaps somebody owing us R100 whom we need to forgive? Is this not the reason why we are with the punishers?

Earnestly ask Holy Spirit to remind you of everybody whom you need to forgive; every hurt you need to forgive; then you forgive in the Name of Jesus Christ, so then you did forgive. Every time you again think about it, you just say: “Thank you Jesus that you helped me to forgive.” You need not do it over and over again, for that will mean that you did not do it in the first instance.

And, of course, as He reminds you, you forgive, every time, with all your heart, and ask Jesus to help you—and then thank Him for helping you.

Make a start, a real beginning; a certain date when you forgive; and after that you only thank Jesus that he helped you to forgive. Start today!

We have to take out our own beam of un-forgiveness, and then we must be very patient with the people with whom we pray, taking them back through their own life, teaching them forgiveness, helping them away from the punishers.

I’m forgiving daily. Every time anything wrong or bad about anybody comes to my attention, I forgive it immediately. Even on the daily news-bulletins there are many negative things – I forgive it. It doesn’t help them, it helps me. It keeps me free and in God’s light.

With continuous forgiveness is also going continuous repentance! Immediately repent of any wrong thoughts what so ever! Then ask God’s forgiveness on all these wrong thoughts and doings. Thus turn around by renewing your thoughts to the Word of God, moment for moment, to be able to stand holy and righteous before God our ABBA Father!

By the undeserved and glorious grace of God I no longer hold any grudges. Yes, sometimes there do still happen some disturbing things, people do grind me and try to insult me – everybody in this work are targets for religious assaults – and sometimes it takes a day or a night of fretting in my heart to forgive absolutely, but now I know! I want to forgive. It doesn’t matter what anybody does to me!

When something like that happens I immediately start praising God, for I know that all things work together for good, for them who love God. At the same time I start forgiving, affirming to God and myself that I fully forgive, working on it, and very soon I can laugh at it – no big deal!

Another thing, I don’t go to the person and tell him I forgive him – it has nothing to do with him and mostly he can’t care less. It is my life with the Christ within me.

Many times, when we ask God’s forgiveness for some sins we did in the past, it “feels” as if God didn’t forgive us – we still remember it and every day we ask His forgiveness, but we just can’t get rid of the feeling of guilt.

This is because you still have not forgiven yourself. You also have to forgive yourself. Most people have grudges against themselves for various reasons. Sometime in the past they did something for which they just can’t forgive themselves. Jesus says: “Forgive if you have aught against any.” You yourself are also included in “any.”

Any grudge you have; be it against any other person, any government, any group, it only defiles yourself! Any hatred brings bitterness in your heart and might cause sickness in your body, even hatred against the devil and hell. Not that he does not deserve it, but because you deserve better! The devil can’t care less about your hatred, but your life suffers from hate.

So, you forgive yourself also. Say it to yourself, ask Jesus to help you forgive yourself and thank Him because He did it. After that, whenever the thought about your sins come back to you, you don’t start thinking again: “There it is back!” No, you immediately start thanking Jesus that He helped you to forgive yourself – keep on praising Him! He says He forgives you, and He says He will never forsake you, and this is true – the “feeling” of guilt is not true, because it contradicts the Bible.

This brings us to the issue of forgetting. We have always been taught that we had to forget after we forgave someone, because “God says He forgets our sins when He forgave us.” Now we must do like God. Then, whenever they remember it again, they think they didn’t forgive at all.

This is not true; God never said something like that! God says He never again thinks about it, but that is not the same as to forget! God knows always all.

There are thousands of things about which I never ever think again, but I haven’t forgotten them, I just don’t think about them. They just don’t mean anything any more.

Jesus earned forgiveness for each one of us through His blood, so, when God forgives you, the forgiven sins are on the other side of Jesus’ blood, on the other side of the cross. Now you can’t go and scratch out those sins again from before the cross!

Many times in a marriage, the husband and wife have fights, then they make up and “forgive”, just until the next fight; then they bring up all the old wrongs and reproaches against each other! That was not forgiveness at all. Whenever you forgive, you make sure you never drag that up again.

I know this is not easy! We are not talking about sissy stuff; we are talking about the most serious stuff in eternity, about you living prosperous here on earth, and eternal life now, and for evermore. The temptation to drag up the old wrongs is there, but, you decide this day to forgive everybody unconditionally – included is forgiveness to your wife or husband, as well as your in-laws – and keep to it!

Same when you forgave somebody, it is back of the cross, so you have no right to go take it back again. The Bible says there is no forgiveness without blood.

Thank and praise Jesus because He helped you to forgive – and keep it up. Soon you won’t even remember it any longer.

People think they first need time to “heal” after anything bad was done to them, before they can forgive. No! Forgiveness IS healing.

People think they have to go to someone for deliverance from bindings—forgiveness is deliverance.

Forgiving brings peace, brings real freedom and it brings health. Forgiveness is the nature of God Himself. Forgiveness is part of seeking first the righteousness of God.

In His grace, Jesus restored my marriage a hundred fold. He made it better than it was ever before; He helps me to never bring up old wrongs, because, in my estimation, there are no old wrongs.

He helps me in my humble ministry, for His glory and honour. On this earth there is no woman more grateful than I am. How I adore Him!

Many wrongs are being done unto others during slavery, apartheid and struggle regimes. Racism and discrimination are still going on all over the world today, wrongs that damage so many people so much!

But, whether it is apartheid towards the blacks, or apartheid towards the whites or towards any other human being on this earth, both have to come to a place where he or she must make it out with himself and God and forgive 70x7 on one day!

Yes, you must ask the following question to yourself: “Do I want to follow the Word, the complete Word of God, or do I want to pick out only those scriptures that suites me?”

If you and me are really serious with our relationship with God, we will know that we cannot choose only those scriptures which we prefer.

God knows the reason why He said that unconditional forgiveness is so important. The reason is that God knows the benefits of freedom and healing for each person who forgives 70x7 times per day.

It is not how small, nor how big our forgiveness should be! God said unconditional forgiveness.

Every time that whites refer to apartheid, every time all ethnic groups and all nations refer to the unfairness of apartheid, or refer to themselves as “agtergeblewenes” or previous disadvantaged, they put themselves under evil bondage of poverty and unforgiveness. Whether it is against your own race or another race, one person against another person, one culture against another culture, forgive them! Set them free for your own good.

All ethnic groups and all nations will forever stay behind because they are sowing in their life’s-garden through their believes, their mouth, the words that they are speaking!

Guard your own thoughts and guard your tongue. Forgive the past, release it in Jesus Name and choose Jesus, choose Life, because only in Him, our Lord Jesus Christ is total freedom.

Through His Grace, He made us who choose Jesus as our Lord and Saviour, the righteousness of God. We are for ever set free!! There cannot be any accusation from the devil anymore because Jesus has set us free through His blood.

Hallelujah, glory to God, praise Jesus! There is only total freedom in Him, Jesus Christ!

Praise and thank Jesus for His mercy and grace!

God bless!

Letta Pretorius